WHERE MIGHT I START?
Increasing my awareness might help
In the "Forums" section above is the Hierarchy of Values - HoV - the Benefit Cost Matrix - BCM - Unconditional Self Acceptance - USA.
Increasing my awareness of how my behaviour might affect ME and those around me has been shown to increase the likelihood of a helpful choice.
Using a tool to increase my awareness is often seen as helpful. Rather than "motivation" finding another "reason" to change and getting helpfully "emotional" about it - and reinforcing this - might help - it has helped others.