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Hierarchy of Values - HoV - From Joe Gerstein - what might I focus on?

Updated: Aug 23

I might make a list of a thing or feeling or value or person that is important to ME.


A thing I REALLY value.


That I value, want back, want more of, or prefer to have in my life.


I might look in “Physical; Mental; Emotional; Family; Financial; Social;” and anywhere else I might CHOOSE to look.


For the purposes of discussion, here's a sample list, in alphabetical order:

  • Family

  • A friend

  • Happiness

  • Health

  • Independence

  • Self-sufficiency

  • Well-being


If I have an unhelpful behaviour, something might be missing?


At the top of the list, on the right – opposite ‘A’ is the word ‘Add’


I might put my unhelpful addictive behaviour there e.g. alcohol, drug, gambling, etc.


What thing that I REALLY value might be able to ‘live’ with my ‘Unhelpful Addictive Behaviour?’

  • Which thing I value, might I gradually lose, or have lost a little over time?

  • Which thing that I value, might be affected?

  • By how much?

In what way might this be what I REALLY want to happen?


I might take a moment to write WHY each thing I value is important to me. Why I value it?


What it does for me? Or enables me to do? What it means to me?


When I sit down and really think about what I value most in my life, my PoU - Poison once Used - tends to not be one of them. Each time that I act out, drink, or use, I might be potentially washing a thing or person I really value, away, just a little more - putting them at risk, with the potential of losing them.


How might I begin CHOOSING that thing or person I value a little more instead?


I might decide to sometimes start crossing out a thing I really value – or that thing at ‘Add?’


I might CHOOSE TO cross out the thing at ‘Add’ now, and then look to make a more helpful choice, a little more often.


I might list a thing that I REALLY value, get a bit more helpfully emotional about it, and do a little work on it today.


Awareness is often the beginning of change – PLANNING; PRACTICE; PERSISTENCE; and PATIENCE – especially WITH MY precious SELF – a planned alteration in my behaviour.


Anyone who believes it is easy has OBVIOUSLY not tried it :P